There’s a reason that the fruits of success are often called “trappings.”
This was recently brought home to me during an interview that Tim Ferris did with one of my favorite coaches, Jerry Colonna.
And it hit me how many of my clients resist change because of the trappings of success.
“I can’t jeopardize my [salary, title, status in the community, standing in my family, etc.]. So while I hear what you’re saying, I can’t possibly change yet.”
A CEO client of mine and I have this conversation every week. It is as if he is at a precipice, and is terrified to jump. He sees that there are two changes he simply must make to reclaim himself, and to let his business expand. To stop the damage that is surely happening as, in his words, he runs his engine at 12,000 rpm. And yet every week he comes to me with valid-feeling excuses about why he took no action.
These trappings truly do trap us.
There’s a loud “achiever” voice that insistently reminds us of all the things we haven’t done and all the ways in which we are still inadequate.
Have you heard this voice?
While it may reflect a story from your childhood or your community or your profession, this voice is not you. Not even close.
There are other voices, other parts of you that are wanting to be heard, too. These voices are quieter, and often, they don’t even use words.
And if you don’t listen to them, to their pleas to take care of yourself, to connect with your loved ones, to notice the staggering beauty in each moment, to know beyond doubt that you are precious and loved and always have been enough, they will get louder.
These voices love you just as much as the achiever voice, and if you are willing to fall into their warm embrace your life will truly become extraordinary.
And if you don’t, they will not hesitate to use exhaustion or even illness to get you to listen.
The trappings of success are all the things that make you look good. But they won’t make you happy. I suspect you have already figured this out.
The only questions are when will you act, and what will you have to go through before you do.
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