I just came in from the garage. Even though my wife is taller than me, she asked me to get the wrapping paper off a high shelf in the garage.
Why? Because she threw out her back doing a weird move with a kettlebell yesterday. And she didn’t think she could reach the wrapping paper without tweaking it.
My wife is powerful and self-sufficient. She’s not used to asking for help. Neither am I. I had minor surgery a couple weeks ago and went through the same thing.
The truth is that we are committed to each other and WANT to help each other. I am happy to help and I know she is for me. I know my default is to do it myself, yet I know I want to help her. I am even delighted to be asked. And I am beginning to understand that sometimes, the best thing to do for both of us is to ask each other for help. To give the other person the gift of helping us.
Sometimes it can feel strange, even, when another person doesn’t even ask for something that I could do easily. Sometimes, the person who is best suited for the task can be hurt when they are not asked.
The same is true for you and your team.
The Deep End of Being a Founder
Most of the founders I work with got there by doing a lot of the work. By having a great idea, yes, but also by working long hours on a lot of things unrelated to that idea.
By the time they get to me, this has often become a problem.
Their team sees them struggle, splashing in the deep end of the pool, and the first thing they want to do is throw them a rope. A finance rope, a product rope, a sales rope.
Each person knows there are things that they are better at than the founder. (In a calmer moment, the founder knows this, too.)
Unfortunately, the founder often thinks continuing to splash is the better choice. Though it’s not really a choice at all. It’s just a habit that used to serve them well.
The First Thing is to Grab the Rope
What if you could see the rope that others are throwing you? What if you could grab it?
What would that create for you?
What would that create for your team?
Can you catch the rope that I’m throwing?
Can you see how supported you are if only you’d stop splashing?