I still occasionally suffer from imposter syndrome and it can stop me dead in my tracks.

Just as an example, who am I to be charging people six figures to coach them, when they are doing things I have never done? Running companies, employing hundreds of people, spending millions of dollars?

But when I look at it more closely, the question, really, is who am I not to be doing that?

I have so much experience that my clients do not.

I have thirty years of personal development work.

Twenty-seven years of regular meditation.

Twenty-five years of coaching and mentoring, the last seven full-time.

I have coached several of my clients through investments and exits. Time after time I have helped them grow their businesses simply by getting out of their own way. By helping them to see through the unhelpful stories they are making up about themselves.

Like, for example, their own imposter syndrome!

So why do I still freeze up?

What Is Imposter Syndrome, Really?

My experience is that Imposter Syndrome is a feeling, a fear, that I’m not up to the task that have in front of me. That if people REALLY KNEW the real me, they wouldn’t be asking me, or paying me, to do that task.

Put another way, Imposter Syndrome can show up as a thought or series of thoughts any time I have any concerns for hesitation or fear that what I am doing might not succeed.

It’s an instinct that keeps us out of danger by keeping us entirely within our comfort zone.

If we allow it to, it keeps us small. If I listened to my Imposter Syndrome, I probably wouldn’t be writing on LinkedIn. Because you might laugh at me or ridicule me or disagree with me or not like me, and all of those things feel incredibly risky.

But I have learned that there is another way to use Imposter Syndrome.

As a pointer. As a gift. And there are at least two gifts that Imposter Syndrome can give you.

The First Gift—The Gift Of Growth

There is a reason you sometimes feel like an imposter, a fraud. Like you don’t know what you are doing.

You feel this way because you actually don’t know what you’re doing.

If you are running a company or even trying something new, you run into things that you don’t know how to do. Things that, to be successful, you have to figure out how to do.

Your Imposter Syndrome lets you know when you are on this edge. If you are a leader, if you are a high achiever, if you a lifelong learner, you will face this edge often.

It means you are continuing to stretch and grow.

If I’m not feeling this, regularly, I take it to mean that something is wrong.

What would it mean for you, for your potential growth, if you were to do the same?

The Bigger Gift—The Gift Of Insight

Another way of thinking about Imposter Syndrome is that the identity that you have taken on does not fit the task you have taken on.

It makes you uncomfortable. There might be skills you can learn to increase your level of comfort. Books you can read, certifications you can get. But there will still be that moment when you have to apply what you have learned. Providing feedback to someone on your team or implementing a strategy.

And these real world things will test you until your identity adapts to them. Until you begin to feel more comfortable and the story you tell yourself begins to accommodate the new learning.

In the gap between your old self and new self there’s an opportunity to see that any story you tell about the self (about the fact that there is even a solid self to begin with) is made up.

A convincing illusion.

I was just talking with a client about this. That the meaning he is giving to the upcoming sale of his business, about whether one multiple is a success and another a failure, about what one multiple means about himself as a success or a failure, is all made up. Even what he says other people are thinking about him is made up.

There is freedom on the other side of this.

Not that it is meaningless. “Meaningless” is a story, too.

But that we are free to live into whatever assumptions we want to make about life. We are free to define our own journey. We are free to take on whatever stories we want to tell ourselves and to experience those stories in their full resonance.

I would love to hear what this might mean for you.

How To Go Deeper

More and more corporate people are coming out of the spiritual closet and seeing their work as a vital personal journal to both abundance and meaning.

This is what I write about. For founders, for original thinkers, at all stages of this journey.

The world needs YOU, in all your brilliance and imperfection.

If you are a founder wanting to scale and sell your company, there are three shifts in identity that can help you do so with twice the impact and half the stress. Take a look at this video.

If you want to build a coaching business where you get to be yourself, help amazing people, and replace your corporate income in the process, here’s a video where I share the top three mistakes I see coaches make when trying to build a sustainable business—

http://bit.ly/creatingextraordinarycoaches

You can subscribe to my YouTube channel here.

You can follow me on LinkedIn to make sure you never miss a post by hitting the bell on my profile.

If you want to subscribe to this Creating Extraordinary Futures newsletter, you can do so here.

I first read about the Zone of Genius in Gay Hendricks’ book The Big Leap from a few years back. The idea is that, beyond our Zone of Excellence (the things that we are really good at), there is a place where we really shine. Where we light up. Where we are so good at something, where it comes so naturally, that it is even hard for us to see it.

It can be hard to see your Zone of Genius because it’s second nature to you.

Let Me Tell You About A Coach Friend Of Mine

I know a coach who so instinctively connects from his heart that he CANNOT SEE IT.

Everyone talks about his big heart. He knows no other way of being. It simply does not occur to him to be other than that.

He’s a perfect example of what I’m talking about.

How To See Your Zone Of Genius

Ask other people.

Ask your customers, your clients, “Why did you hire me?”

Ask your partner, “Why are you with me?”

Ask your colleagues. Your friends.

You will likely hear something that you have heard before. And been quick to dismiss, in that “aw, everybody can do it.”

They can’t. YOU can.

Here is the most important thing to do with what you find.

OWN IT.

Your Zone Of Genius Is Yours Alone

And the world needs it.

It’s time to own it and create in the world with it.

If you need some help seeing yours, let’s talk.

Because my Zone of Genius is seeing yours. And holding you accountable to finally creating everything you can with it and from it.

How To Go Deeper

I am convinced that more and more people are coming out of the spiritual closet and seeing their work, their Zone of Genius, as a vital personal journey to both abundance and meaning.

This is what I write about. For founders, for original thinkers, at all stages of this journey.

The world needs YOU, in all your brilliance and imperfection.

If you are a founder wanting to scale and sell your company, there are three shifts in identity that can help you do so with twice the impact and half the stress. Take a look at this video.

If you want to build a coaching business where you get to be yourself, help amazing people, and replace your corporate income in the process, here’s a video where I share the top three mistakes I see coaches make when trying to build a sustainable business—

http://bit.ly/creatingextraordinarycoaches

You can subscribe to my YouTube channel here.

You can follow me on LinkedIn to make sure you never miss a post by hitting the bell on my profile.

If you want to subscribe to this Creating Extraordinary Futures newsletter, you can do so here.

That’s not a typo.

I’ve been reading a lot lately—I use reading to think about bigger things, like what I want to accomplish in the coming year.

But Simon Sinek, through his book The Infinite Game, has me thinking bigger.

Most of us, especially in the corporate world, play way too small.

Simon Sinek writes about James Carse and his idea that there are Finite Games and Infinite Games.

Finite Games and Infinite Games

Finite Games are games in which the rules are very clear. Finite Games have a clear beginning and a clear ending. They have a clear winner and a clear loser, too.

Sports are finite games. I can tell when the Denver Broncos or the Green Bay Packers win or lose. Even if there is disagreement, it is about how the rules apply, not whether there are rules and a winner and a loser.

The purpose of a Finite Game is to win the game.

Humans create finite games because they are a fun way to challenge ourselves. But they do not naturally occur. A tree is not a finite game.

Infinite Games are things that have no clear beginning or ending. They have no clear winner or loser.

The purpose of an Infinite Game is to continue playing. The joy is in the playing of the game rather than the destination.

Many things in our lives, especially in the corporate world, are Infinite Games that we have turned into Finite Games.

For example, the goal of a corporation, ultimately, is to continue. To provide a product or service that benefits society and to continue doing that as long as there is a benefit from that product or service.

Starting with Milton Friedman, many began thinking of corporations as a way to maximize shareholder wealth.

In other words, as a Finite Game, with clear winners and losers. The score was kept through stock prices and quarterly earnings reports.

But this can’t be right. Because companies interact with shareholders and suppliers and customers and employees and when a company is thriving, all of those things thrive. Even the environment can thrive when a successful corporation thrives.

To view the corporation as a Finite Game can actually create it as a finite entity. An entity that maximizes profit for a short time and then vanishes. Leaving customers and employees and even whole towns in its wake.

Is that what we really want?

Why This Matters

Why do we play Infinite Games? Why do we keep playing them?

Simon Sinek talks about what he calls a Just Cause.

I recently finished Elon Musk’s biography by Walter Isaacson. It’s not likely to change your opinion of Musk, a mixed bag of a human being if there ever was one.

But like him or not it is clear that Musk does not keep score with money. He has a bigger vision. He wants to save the world with renewable energy—including solar and electric cars. And if that fails he wants us to be able to colonize Mars, to be able to escape the Earth should we render it inhospitable.

That’s a Just Cause.

A Just Cause is something that you will likely not achieve. But you are willing to die in the attempt.

A Just Cause will inspire others to join you. It will motivate people beyond your lifetime.

A Just Cause is a reason people join companies. It is a reason people invest in companies. It is a reason people buy from companies.

A Just Cause may make money, but the money allows greater pursuit of the Just Cause. It isn’t an end in itself.

A Just Cause is about 2124 rather than 2024.

What’s Your Just Cause?

The irony is that I talk to a lot of people who are not willing to look for or own their Just Cause.

They are not willing to own and talk about that thing that motivates them. The reason they do what they do.

Instead they want to talk about the Finite Game of what they do. The business model, the profit margins.

It feels too audacious to have a Just Cause.

It can feel like bragging. But is it, to have a cause bigger than yourself? To do things for the sake of that cause rather than for your own sake (or your bank account’s)?

I want as many people to be impacted by transformative coaching as possible. Because I have seen, over and over again, that people who have had access to great coaching do amazing things in the world and become amazing human beings in the process.

The world needs more of that.

A. LOT. MORE.

I spend a lot of time coaching people and not getting paid for it. I spend a lot of time helping other coaches and not getting paid for it. I am sure I could make more money just building a coaching business. But I am helping other coaches, I am helping leadership organizations, I am on boards of nonprofits for a reason. Because it helps them be more effective in the world. It helps them with their Just Cause.

Yes, there is a small number of people who pay me handsomely. But even in that I know that I will have an impact not only on them but on every person who works for them. On every person who comes into contact with them.

I make enough money that I have time to devote to my Just Cause.

What about you?

How To Go Deeper

I am convinced that more and more people are coming out of the spiritual closet and seeing their work as a vital personal journey to both abundance and meaning.

This is what I write about. For founders, for original thinkers, at all stages of this journey.

The world needs YOU, in all your brilliance and imperfection.

If you are a founder wanting to scale and sell your company, there are three shifts in identity that can help you do so with twice the impact and half the stress. Take a look at this video.

If you want to build a coaching business where you get to be yourself, help amazing people, and replace your corporate income in the process, here’s a video where I share the top three mistakes I see coaches make when trying to build a sustainable business—

http://bit.ly/creatingextraordinarycoaches

You can subscribe to my YouTube channel here.

You can follow me on LinkedIn to make sure you never miss a post by hitting the bell on my profile.

If you want to subscribe to this Creating Extraordinary Futures newsletter, you can do so here.

If you think you are enlightened, spend a week with your family. — Ram Dass

This week’s article is an offering for Thanksgiving.

I know a lot of founders, some of them clients, who will use their success in their business as a way to avoid work on themselves and their relationships.

They often tell me that the person they are most afraid of is their spouse. Or one of their parents.

This resonates with me. I still struggle with it. And I have come up with a personal experiment that I want to share with you.

This week, in the US at least, many of us will spend an extended period of time with our family. Often reentering our childhood homes in the process.

It can feel like we revert to being children again. All the things that used to trigger us—a look from Dad, a button-pushing comment from your oldest sister—show up again.

I find myself in the same political fights with my mother that I have been having for the last thirty years.

What’s your version of this?

What if you did an experiment?

See if you can, just this one time, NOT react. Not fall for the bait.

My mom and I have this strange dynamic where she picks fights with me, and sometimes me with her, to feel alive. It’s like we can’t say the stuff we want to say—that we love and care for each other—but we can show our love, how we care, by fighting.

I’ve talked with a lot of people who have something similar going on in their family. It can feel like judgment but when you look underneath, the energy can only be described as love. You miss it when it’s gone. Even, perhaps especially, the difficult stuff.

The Power of a Pause

If you want to change the dynamic, see if you can PAUSE. See if you can say “Hmm, not sure. That’s an interesting point.” Or “Yes, you might be right.”

When I do this, my mom quickly stops trying to engage. Most of the time, anyway. And we move on to other things. Things that matter more. We have begun to relax a bit more, to enjoy our time together more. Which is important to me because my mom is 87. And I want to feel like I am there for her in her final years, even though there were times I did not feel she was there for me.

It can be strange now. Boring even. There is a vacuum that needs to be filled. People will try to find all kinds of ways to fill it. Sometimes my mom still tries to pick a fight with me. Sometimes she still tries to make me feel small.

But the equilibrium has shifted. And it can for you.

When that opening comes, what will you fill it with?

Happy Thanksgiving.

How To Go Deeper

I am convinced that more and more people are coming out of the spiritual closet and seeing their work as a vital personal journey to both abundance and meaning.

This is what I write about. For founders, for original thinkers, at all stages of this journey.

The world needs YOU, in all your brilliance and imperfection.

If you are a founder wanting to scale and sell your company, there are three shifts in identity that can help you do so with twice the impact and half the stress. Take a look at this video.

If you want to build a coaching business where you get to be yourself, help amazing people, and replace your corporate income in the process, here’s a video where I share the top three mistakes I see coaches make when trying to build a sustainable business—

http://bit.ly/creatingextraordinarycoaches

You can subscribe to my YouTube channel here.

You can follow me on LinkedIn to make sure you never miss a post by hitting the bell on my profile.

If you want to subscribe to this Creating Extraordinary Futures newsletter, you can do so here.