Ever been stuck asking, “What do I do next?”

If you’re a founder or CEO, chances are you’ve asked that more than once—usually when you’re already knee-deep in complexity, growth pressures, or uncertainty.

It can feel big, and overwhelming.

Here’s the truth I share with leaders all the time:

You Already Know

You already know what you need to do. You might be afraid, but you know.

The real question is: How do you know that you know?

There’s a moment I call the Pick Now moment—that space where clarity pierces through the panic and the noise. When you just pick, without overanalyzing, without having to know if and how things are going to work out.

It’s quiet, and it doesn’t come from fear. It feels calm. Patient. You’re not frantically scanning 27 possible next steps. You’re breathing. You’re listening.

Here’s how to find it:

• Get quiet. Let the voices in your head slow down.
• Notice the relief. That gentle inner “aha” of what the next step is, Oh… I need to talk to them. Or rest. Or decide.
• Breathe. Try my 4×4 breath: deep belly inhale for four seconds, let it out, let the tension pour out through your feet like water into a drain. Do that four times. More if you can.

You won’t get stone tablets or a divine 10-step plan. But you will know the next thing. And when you choose from that space—grounded, not reactive—you shift everything.

There’s wisdom in your body. It knows.

So: Take a breath. Feel what’s true.

And then… Pick Now. And feel the relief in knowing you are now in motion and ready to learn what’s next.

Everything you want is on the other side of a Pick Now moment.

Want To Go Deeper?

Reach out.

If you are at a true crossroads, you might be a fit for my two day event for Founders in Denver, October 20-21.

Let me know if you would like to learn more.

Think of a great leader.

Steve Jobs? Had it.

Michael Jordan? Had it.

Elon Musk? Has it. (Perhaps to a fault.)

What is the “it” that I am talking about, the secret sauce?

Is it team building? No.

Is it strategic thinking? No.

Is it visionary ideas? No.

What I am talking about is simple, and, if done repeatedly and well, can lead to all those other things.

A bias for action.

Why a Bias for Action is a Prerequisite to Powerful Leadership

Have you ever been part of a team that was coming up with the strategic plan for the year? Or a financial forecast?

Were you energized?

My experiences with this, both at large organizations and small, was that they were soul-sucking. Everyone suffered through a seemingly required (and certainly dreadful) process until the team got to a lowest-common denominator plan that no one was excited about, nor paid much attention to after they left the conference room.

The teams that were exciting to be a part of were the teams that tried things. The teams that put out things into the real world and then adapted.

They were led by people who were willing to do the same.

The Three Things That Action Brings

Data. Putting out a piece of content or a prototype or even a product with a price gets you immediate feedback. So does trying a new move in a game or a new line in a concert.

Did it work? What did you like? What didn’t you like?

No arguments about what might happen and what might not. Discussions about what actually did work.

Permission to take risk. If YOU take action, even if and especially if you fail, you give permission to everyone else to do the same. And when you take risk, especially if that risk is managed appropriately, at some point you tend to get results.

Speed. There is no faster way to see if something is going to work than to try it. And if it doesn’t work, you get a really good sense of what needs to change. And you change it and try again (see permission to take risk above).

Why Don’t You Take Action?

If you’re like me, you’ve spent a lot of years not taking action, not taking risks, not doing the one thing that really lights you up.

During those years, decades even, there was only one thing that was getting in my way.

Fear.

Fear might show up as a lot of different things–

Strategizing.

Planning.

Being practical.

Waiting for the “right time.”

Avoiding “failure” (while avoiding success as well).

But what’s on the other side of that fear?

Everything you say you want. And probably much much more.

For you, for your team, for your company.

What’s One Small Action You Can Take Today?

Get moving, and it gets easier.

Do one thing a day for 30 days and see where you are.

I bet it will amaze you.

Now do that for the rest of your life. And see not only what you do, but more important, how you feel.

Experience with this? Let me know in the comments.

“I can’t wait to have a day off so I can get some work done.”

I get it.

There is so much to do. So many decisions to make, fires to fight.

And when your people have a day off it means you might finally have some space to make some decisions.

Don’t do it.

The Day Off Trap

You are believing an illusion—the idea that there is a finite amount of work and that if you only had enough time you could do it all.

That if you just use this day off you can “get ahead of things.”

That at some point, things will be less busy.

When was the last time this happened? Between companies? (Maybe?)

Every choice you make creates at least one more choice.

If you want space you have to make space.

If you want things to be less crazy, YOU have to be less crazy.

What Busy Actually Means

Life is just a series of choices arriving in the present moment.

We CREATE it, though, as a master plan that we can (in the words of one of my founder clients) “game theory” through several steps in advance.

But if you really watch, this is what is happening.

A choice appears. You make it. Time passes. Another choice appears. You make it.

All the time in between, processing or figuring things out or planning or strategizing?

Wasted time and energy.

Time and energy that you could be using to step back. To recover. To see the next choice that presents itself.

A Real Day Off!

That is what a REAL day off looks like. A break from all the ruminating (or at least some of it).

Time connecting with family and friends (and not sneaking looks at your phone).

Laughing. Feeling just a little bit less stress for a little bit of time.

You might even find you like it.

Enjoy this holiday weekend. As much as you are able to let yourself. And I promise your world will look different next week.

If you’d like more of that, reach out. I have some ideas for you.

I just got off a conversation with two close friends—both entrepreneurs, both carrying immense responsibilities at work and at home.

We landed on a powerful distinction: the difference between being needy and having needs.

As leaders, as providers, many of us grew up believing that showing neediness is weakness. I know I was taught that my needs were a burden to the other people around me, especially my anxiety-ridden mom. Over time, I didn’t just suppress my neediness—I buried my needs. And those unmet needs? They always managed to come out later. As rage, frustration, avoidance, or worse.

One friend shared how he’s going through a tough time. What he needs is simple: appreciation, reassurance, acknowledgment. But he’s afraid to ask—afraid it’ll make him look weak or needy.

We each had a form of that need for appreciation, for a pat on the back, for the reassurance that even if things look tough right now, they are going to be ok.

It felt amazing to say that to each other, and to have that appreciation reflected back to us. Because each of us could appreciate what the other was going through.

What Have You Been Hiding?

It made me ask myself—and now I ask you:

• As a leader, what needs are you not even aware of?
• How does that show up in your leadership?
• What could you uncover if you allowed yourself to need?
• What would it unlock, in your and your team, if you gave yourself permission to ask for help?

Expressing needs isn’t weakness. It’s a form of courageous leadership that invites connection, clarity, and authenticity.

Your vulnerability is a magnet that gives permission for others to express their needs, their fears.

And it creates a powerful bond that enhances both loyalty and performance. Even if, at first, the person you are vulnerable with is not part of your team.

What Can You Admit?

I’d love to hear your thoughts. What does this bring up in you?

What are you afraid to admit, to yourself and your team?

How do you navigate this line between vulnerability and strength?

#Leadership #EmotionalIntelligence #Vulnerability #ExecutiveCoaching #Authenticity